I’ve lost two people close to me to suicide. In both situations, I saw the signs. We talked about their thoughts of suicide. They got help. And in both cases, their pain and suffering became too much. While I think the survivor guilt is always there — the “if only” thoughts that linger — I have mostly come to peace with my role in trying to support them. Sometimes despite all of our best efforts and resources, we might still lose people to addiction, overdose and suicide.

We often hold mental health professionals to the unrealistic standard of saving everyone. We don’t have this expectation for our oncologists or cardiologists. We expect them to do the very best job they can based on the very best science and tools that exist. And, while deaths from heart disease and cancer are very tragic, we often give grace and even gratitude to our loved ones’ care providers in these areas.

In this episode, I speak with fellow psychologist, Dr. Dan Reidenberg about his experience losing a friend and board member to suicide. We lift up a call to action to the mental health community to expand the conversation on how suicide loss impacts those of us in the field of suicide prevention.

About Dr. Dan Reidenberg

Dr. Dan Reidenberg is the Executive Director of SAVE.org, Managing Director of the National Council for Suicide Prevention and is a Special Advisor to the International Association for Suicide Prevention. He is a Certified Psychological Autopsy Investigator and serves on several national and international editorial boards.

Dr. Reidenberg worked on inpatient psychiatric units for adolescents and adults in hospitals in addition to having a private practice. He has presented to over 350,000 people around the world, has written more than 55 articles and 4 book chapters and was one of the lead authors of the US National Strategy for the Prevention of Suicide. He developed an evidence-based program for schools and works with the leading technology companies on mental health related tools and apps. He wrote the US Best Practices for Media Reporting on Suicide and for Media Reporting on Mass Shootings, created the only online peer support program for suicide, a leading program for the construction industry called IBEAM as well as One Step Ahead – a comprehensive model work place suicide prevention program. He has conducted training for some of the nation’s top 100 companies, at The White House, The Pentagon and created suicide prevention guides for law enforcement and their families.

Dr. Reidenberg has been interviewed by major media including: CNN, Larry King, Good Morning America, Good Morning Europe, PBS, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Huffington Post, Time, Newsweek, People, Rolling Stone, BBC and radio in Australia, Russia, Canada and the UK.

He received the Service to Humanity Award, the Service to Suicidology Award, was recognized as a Champion of Change by The Obama Administration and he is listed in Who’s Who in America, Who’s Who in the World and with the Marquis Who’s Who Lifetime Achievement Award.