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Myth Busting -- Fatherhood, Fact Checking and Men's Mental Health: Interview with Josh Levs | Episode 62

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Myth Busting -- Fatherhood, Fact Checking and Men's Mental Health: Interview with Josh Levs | Episode 62

There are many stories we tell that hold men back from living their best lives. Here are a few that create barriers for men to reach out when they are distressed (Solomon):

  1. “No sissy stuff” — in other words, if it is what women do, then it’s not for “real men.”

  2. “Be a big wheel” — you are what you do for a living; achievement and your paycheck define your worth.

  3. “Sturdy oak” — you are the one people lean on for help; you don’t lean on others.

  4. “Give ‘em hell” — when all else fails, come out swinging; better to intimidate than to look weak.

In this episode, I speak with the internationally acclaimed “fact checking” journalist Josh Levs who has been busting myths about fatherhood for years. We examine the faulty scripts, how they contribute to the suffering of families, and we challenge listeners to adopt a new mindset on developing an “All In Life.”

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9 Tactics to Stay Present When Life is Uncertain: Interview with Hugh Ingalls | Episode 61

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9 Tactics to Stay Present When Life is Uncertain: Interview with Hugh Ingalls | Episode 61

Ambiguity is tolerated by some better than others. Small experiences of uncertainty can be exhilarating and bring us the joy of surprise. Large and prolonged periods of uncertainty can cause debilitating anxiety, leaving people paralyzed. In this interview, Hugh Ingalls and I discuss nine tactics people can use when living in uncertainty to help stay present and reduce anxiety.

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Coping with Anxiety and Loneliness with Digital Health: Interview with Dr. Nathaan Demers | Episode 60

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Coping with Anxiety and Loneliness with Digital Health: Interview with Dr. Nathaan Demers | Episode 60

“Anxiety is nothing…but repeatedly experiencing failure in advance. What a waste.,” Seth Godin

Anxiety, worry, overwhelm, panic - the “what if” escalation can paralyze us. The Anxiety and Depression Association of American estimates that 40 million people in the US experience forms of anxiety that significantly impact their lives….In this interview, I talk with Dr. Nathaan Demers, a psychologist who has been working on digital tools specifically designed to help young people build skills to overcome anxiety and loneliness. Along with the Hopelab, he has developed “workout plans” to help young people build social skills, self compassion and manage stress.

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Leading Others to Resilience -- 3 Ways to Accelerate Organizational Recovery During Crisis: Interview with Bob VandePol | Episode 59

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Leading Others to Resilience -- 3 Ways to Accelerate Organizational Recovery During Crisis: Interview with Bob VandePol | Episode 59

In this interview I speak with crisis response expert Bob VandePol on crisis leadership. We explore the questions of how do leaders embody resilience during trauma? How can leaders sustain a group commitment to a mission greater than the individual? How can leaders cultivate trust and social support when things feel out of control? How do we develop a resilience plan that transitions people to grow through crisis?

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How to Fight Soul Exhaustion -- Soul Care During Difficult Times: Interview with Sarah Gaer | Episode 58

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How to Fight Soul Exhaustion -- Soul Care During Difficult Times: Interview with Sarah Gaer | Episode 58

When we are in crisis we find ourselves constantly drained by the urgent and important things in our life that demand our attention. Should we get a moment of reprieve, we often succumb to the desire to escape by engaging in something that numbs us out. In this podcast we talk about making time for spiritual wellness during difficult times. My guest, suicide prevention specialist and community trauma responder Sarah Gaer, gives us some concrete ideas on how we can tend to our souls when our world seems like it’s falling down around us.

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Leadership's Role in Workplace Mental Health -- Inspiring a Collective Mindset of Care: Interview with Cal Beyer | Episode 57

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Leadership's Role in Workplace Mental Health -- Inspiring a Collective Mindset of Care: Interview with Cal Beyer | Episode 57

What are the steps leaders need to take in cultivating a mindset of psychological well-being and a caring community? In this podcast, Cal Beyer and I analyze the steps many leaders have taken to make suicide prevention and mental health promotion health and safety priorities at work.

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Recovery is Community -- Men, Addiction & Moving Off Macho Island: Interview with Rourke Weaver | Episode 56

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Recovery is Community -- Men, Addiction & Moving Off Macho Island: Interview with Rourke Weaver | Episode 56

“Never trust a man who doesn’t drink,” John Wayne

From the Rat Pack to Animal House to Ernest Hemingway to John Wayne, many cultural icons of masculinity have glamorized the idea that booze puts hair on your chest.

The Tough Guy Culture and Addiction

Traditional American messages of masculinity teach boys to be lone wolves and to stuff down emotions. Feelings (except anger) then become taboo. This messaging creates a problem for boys and men who feel fear, grief, shame and more and don’t have role models on how to express these emotions openly. Instead, men often learn to take action when feeling these feelings by numbing emotions or distracting themselves with many forms of addictive behavior.

Traditional norms of masculinity also endorse ideals of self-control. Thus, despite high levels of substance use triggered by conflict, pain, and uncomfortable feelings, many men believe they can control their substance use well past the point of significant consequences in relationships, work and health. Because of this, they often wait until their use is causing catastrophic outcomes before they reach out to, or more typically accept others’ help.

Add to this dynamic the need for young people to experience “coming of age” rituals to make a shift from child to adult. For many young men and teens risky behavior around substances often fit the bill. Competition, fearlessness and invulnerability fuel increasingly dangerous pathways to addiction, especially for young adults who are genetically predisposed to have vulnerability to substance use disorders. In this podcast Rourke Weaver and I talk about how cultures of masculinity can fuel problems in addiction — and how they can also be leveraged powerfully when groups of men come together in recovery.

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Living with Depression Where It's Hard to Share: Interview with Cameron Stout | Episode 55

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Living with Depression Where It's Hard to Share: Interview with Cameron Stout | Episode 55

In this podcast I sit down with Cameron Stout, a securities defense lawyer who is boldly being “vocal, visible and visionary” in his industry by sharing his journey through and resilient recovery from depression and alcoholism. Attorneys are often type A professionals who are driven to succeed, yet often are reluctant to express vulnerability and share personal challenges. By speaking publicly about his recovery from major depression in 2013, and describing his seven years of sobriety, Cam reduces stigma, and helps others find the courage to be open. In addition to telling his story, Cam outlines the therapies, treatment, and wellness practices that have been key in his recovery process. As Cam will describe for us, his mission of being a storyteller has also been a large part of his own healing, as it can be for all of us.

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Emotional Intelligence at Work -- Building Trust and Transparency Leadership Skills: Interview with Brent Darnell | Episode 54

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Emotional Intelligence at Work -- Building Trust and Transparency Leadership Skills: Interview with Brent Darnell | Episode 54

Despite being in public awareness for many years, emotional intelligence remains an undervalued competency in many workplaces. The more we learn about the impact of training on emotional intelligence at work, the more we impressed we are with the ways it can affect safety, retention and even insurance costs. If you are an “Alpha” or a “Self-Sacrificer” in your leadership style, you may experience burnout if you are not able to cultivate emotional intelligence skills. In the podcast, we help leaders overcome “the smartest person in the room syndrome, and learn more about the four basic elements to emotional intelligence and the 16 competencies of the EQ-i 2.0…

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Gratitude in Action -- How To Practice Gratitude and Unlock Happiness: Interview with Justin Kruger | Episode 53

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Gratitude in Action -- How To Practice Gratitude and Unlock Happiness: Interview with Justin Kruger | Episode 53

Gratitude is the foundation of happiness. Practicing gratitude is like “going to the gym” for your emotional resilience. Lifting weights, yoga and jogging help keep up our strength, flexibility and endurance. Daily practices of gratitude and kindness build our mental fitness. In this podcast I speak with the Founder and CEO of Project Helping, Justin Kruger. We discuss how “gratitude in action” helps individuals and communities. Some daily practices we explore are:

1) Building a gratitude inventory through daily reflections or a Hope Kit.

2) Learning to give thanks freely, especially to those whose good work often goes unnoticed.

3) Giving yourself some grace and self-gratitude

4) Finding joy in intentional acts of kindness

But I Didn’t Say Goodbye -- Helping Families After a Suicide: Interview with Barbara Rubel | Episode 52

But I Didn’t Say Goodbye -- Helping Families After a Suicide: Interview with Barbara Rubel | Episode 52

“Grief is love not wanting to let go.”

When children are grieving a death by suicide, they need the caring adults around them to help them find their way through Wordon’s tasks of mourning:

Task #1: Accept the Reality of the Loss

Task #2: Process the Pain of the Grief

Task #3: Adjust to a World without the Deceased

Task #4: Move on to an Enduring Connection While Embarking on a New Life

In this podcast, I interview Barbara Rubel, author of But I Didn’t Say Goodbye: Helping Families After a Suicide. We walk through specific strategies families and other caring adults can use to support kids bereaved by suicide across many developmental ages.

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Wellness at Work — What the Fire Service Can Teach Us about Creating a Kitchen Table Culture: Interview with Captain Dena Ali | Episode 51

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Wellness at Work — What the Fire Service Can Teach Us about Creating a Kitchen Table Culture: Interview with Captain Dena Ali | Episode 51

Our best bet in preventing suicide is to get in front of it.

Way in front.

Promoting protective factors not only will reduce the risk of suicide — it also is a great way to build a life worth living. In this podcast, I interview Captain Dena Ali about what we have learned about wellness at work from the fire service and the mitigating effects of social support, mindfulness and sleep. We also talk about the power of peer support to promote these buffering factors and how small interventions can go a long way. As you listen to Captain Ali, ask yourself, “How can these protective factors of the fire service be translated to other industries and workplaces? 

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The Human Side of Crisis Management: Interview with Tricia Kagerer | Episode 50

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The Human Side of Crisis Management: Interview with Tricia Kagerer | Episode 50

“We are not just human resources, we are human beings.”

A significant workplace traumatic event can make or break a company depending on how well the employer has prepared for it — at the heart of a successful transition through the crisis is the how well leadership connects with the people most impacted by the trauma. In this interview, Tricia Kagerer, an expert in workplace risk management, shares key steps in helping companies move from “it-will-never-happen-here” mentality to building a responsive plan for crisis.

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Social Media, SEO & Suicide -- How Can We Intervene On-Line When People Have Lost Hope?: Interview with Anne Moss Rogers | Episode 49

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Social Media, SEO & Suicide -- How Can We Intervene On-Line When People Have Lost Hope?: Interview with Anne Moss Rogers | Episode 49

How do we help people in despair overcome emotional pain and reconnect to purpose through an on-line intervention? Connection is the answer. Technology is the tool…

My interview this week is with Anne Moss Rogers. After losing her son Charles to suicide, digital marketing expert, Anne Moss decided to use social media and SEO skills to reach those Googling “ways to die” with the goal of saving lives. The results have been remarkable and unexpected.

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When Therapists Have Lived through Suicide Intensity -- Deep Insights on Helping the Suicidal Person: Interview with Dr. Stacey Freedenthal | Episode 48

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When Therapists Have Lived through Suicide Intensity -- Deep Insights on Helping the Suicidal Person: Interview with Dr. Stacey Freedenthal | Episode 48

Do mental health providers’ own personal histories with suicide impact their interactions with and attitudes towards people experiencing suicide intensity? What happens when clinicians disclose their own suicide attempts to the public or to their clients? Does an “insider’s view” help a therapist to be more of an ally than an adversary? In this interview Dr. Stacey Freedenthal and I explore these questions as we have an in-depth conversation about her deep insights in helping the suicide person.

Teens Bereaved by Suicide -- Moving Forward When You Feel Left Behind: Interview with Jason Holzer | Episode 47

Teens Bereaved by Suicide -- Moving Forward When You Feel Left Behind: Interview with Jason Holzer | Episode 47

When a teen loses a loved one to suicide, the intense reactions can be overwhelming, and sometimes the caring adults don’t know what to do to help. Teens who are already feeling the pressure of school and social expectations can be very challenged in navigating the complexity of suicide bereavement. In this interview, Jason shares his journey from surviving to thriving after losing his Dad to suicide when he was 17.

The Forgotten Mourners — Disenfranchised Grief of Siblings Bereaved by Suicide: Interview with Dr. Lena Heilmann | Episode 46

The Forgotten Mourners — Disenfranchised Grief of Siblings Bereaved by Suicide: Interview with Dr. Lena Heilmann | Episode 46

Author of “Still with Us: Voices of Sibling Suicide Loss,” Dr. Lena Heilmann joins me for our shared reflection on the experience of losing a brother or sister to suicide. We speak about how in this form of loss, siblings experience losing their past, present and future. Lena also suggests many strategies for coping with the grief and trauma of suicide loss.

Global Perspectives on World Suicide Prevention -- A Glimpse inside the World Congress of Suicide Prevention: Interviews with World Congress Delegates | Episode 45

Global Perspectives on World Suicide Prevention -- A Glimpse inside the World Congress of Suicide Prevention: Interviews with World Congress Delegates | Episode 45

Over 855 delegates from 57 countries convened in Derry/Londonderry to share the science, stories and strategy of suicide prevention and suicide grief/trauma support. The theme of the conference was "Breaking Down Walls, Building Bridges" and the conference planners were exceptionally mindful about equity in their selection of speakers and content. The voices of people with lived experience were prevalent throughout and one of my favorite sessions was among prominent suicidologists and clinicians who shared their experiences with discrimination and prejudice within the field of suicide prevention. We also had an opportunity to honor the lives and service of two giants in our field who died way too soon -- Prof Allison Milner and Dr. Jan Mokkenstorm. Tune in to be inspired to be part of this international community pulling together to prevent suicide and alleviate suffering.

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Suicide and Culture -- Arts, Religion and Social Justice: Interview with Dr. Erminia Colucci | Episode 44

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Suicide and Culture -- Arts, Religion and Social Justice: Interview with Dr. Erminia Colucci | Episode 44

In the United States our suicide rates are going up,  but in much of the world, the suicide rates are going down. In this interview I speak with the world renowned Erminia Colucci to discuss the Anglo perspective of a highly medicalized perspective of suicide and contrast that with an understanding of suicide in a larger context. In her view, we must situate suicide prevention within a social, cultural and political context to be effective. She is part of a group of “Critical Suicidologists” who are challenging some of the “truths” we have accepted within the suicide prevention field. As an activist researcher she wants to engage with the community and helps us better to understand the root causes of inequality, oppression, violence and related conditions of human suffering. 

Erminia and I have this conversation at the World Congress for Suicide Prevention in Derry, Ireland. We are sitting in an art studio in the Playhouse for this conversation, and explore a ‘different way’ to help people on their darkest day. 

Take aways:

  1. Suicide needs to be seen in a larger context within the cultures people belong to

  2. We need to break the silence in some areas of understanding suicide like social justice

  3. By exploring alternative methods that work for people, like the arts, faith, and others, we can make a difference to alleviate suffering and prevent suicide.

Working Together to Prevent Suicide --What the World Can Learn from One Another on #WSPD: Interview with Professor Rory O'Connor | Episode 43

Working Together to Prevent Suicide --What the World Can Learn from One Another on #WSPD: Interview with Professor Rory O'Connor | Episode 43

The World Health Organization has declared suicide prevention a global imperative. Every year World Suicide Prevention falls on September 10th. This year I interviewed Professor Rory O’Connor as he prepared for the 30th World Congress of Suicide Prevention in Derry, Northern Ireland.